All I ever wanted

All I ever wanted
Was you to hold me in your arms,
Help me with the pain
From all of these scares,

All I ever wanted
Was to just be loved,
Wash away all the memories
And just hold me above,

Keep me from drowning
In my puddles of tears,
All of them from crying over the years,

All I ever wanted
Was you to show me that you cared,
To open your arms so I knew you were there,

All I ever wanted
Was for you to feel the same,
But now I just sit here filled with shame,

I have sat here
Hoping,
Wishing that things would change,
Siting here with feeling like maybe someday,
But now I sit here thinking
Someday may never come,
Just sitting here wondering what have I done,

So I sit here with this decision
That I have split into two,
Because I have tried so hard
I don't know what to do,
To put myself in the position where things
May never change,
Or put myself in the position try
To save,
To save the rest of this broken heart
That worn,
Try to scrape up my
Confidence scattered across the floor,
Try to clean up my self esteem
I may need it along the way,
But it still leaves me with these decisions
And you asking me to stay,

I feel I have broken your confidence,
From being vulnerable,
And afraid,
Without you understanding
Why I feel this way,
So broken,
So defeated,
Can't move or think of what to say,
You ask for answered but what more can I say
Are things just to passed damages to try to be saved,

All I ever wanted
Was to show me you could try,
Before the point of no return
And the expense of my demise,

All I ever wanted
Was some feeling of hope,
Before our lack of love
Was at the end of its rope,

All I ever wanted
Was for you to show me
You felt the same,
Before we passed that point on
The darkest of days,

If all you ever wanted
Was just to be with me,
Than why was it so hard for you to just be....
Happy

I sit in this position
Where you leave it in my hands,
Not knowing what to do or even if I can,
I say I need space because
I don't know what to do,
Your asking me to make this
Decision also for you,

But within this decision it's not only about me,
But it is truly about being free,
Be free from all the anger,
Be free from all the pain,
Be free from all the hurt,
And the feeling of shame,
Be free from heartache,
And know what it's like to feel love,
Be free from all the stress that we have
Both caused,

Feel free to laugh,
Feel free to love,
Feel free to be open,
And never be judged,
Feel free to feel hope,
Passion,
Desire,
For these are things that make you
Feel life's fire,

Are these things I have not offered to you?
But now you sit here asking me
What I am going to do..,